Did you break your marijuana habit for days, weeks, or even months at a time only to find yourself smoking some weed one day and then falling back into to same old pattern of pot smoking?
Marijuana relapse is not unusual so don’t beat yourself up too much. You just need a strategy to get back on track with your life.
Below is my own personal account of relapse. Hopefully, there’s something to be learned to apply in your own life.
Time for honesty…
I ended my weed habit on a very symbolic date: 4/20/14. On the high holy day of weed smoking, I was renouncing my religion. I had been tapering off my usage already and I picked this day to end it once and for all. I was finally so disgusted with my habit that quitting didn’t seem so hard. Plus, the instructions I had been following in Quit Marijuana The Complete Guide eased me into it.
I went through spring and summer 100% free of marijuana and I felt the benefits. I had more energy, I was more productive, and that old mental fog had lifted. It felt good. I was happy with myself. Life was back on track. I felt like I was cruising with this weed free thing. I had even hung out with pothead friends a time or two without feeling the need to smoke anything myself.
Then a moment of weakness came along. It was the last Saturday of October and I was looking forward to a carefree weekend. It was a sunny but breezy autumn day, the leaves were rustling outside, there were Halloween parties to go to, and plenty of football games on TV. The only thing related to work I needed to do was wash a couple of loads of clothes.
So, after my first cup of coffee, I put in a load of clothes. I leave the laundry room and return a little while later to find water all over the floor. Damn. The drain for the washing machine was backed up. To make a long story short, I spent the next 6 hours unclogging the drain and cleaning up the aftermath. I was mad, tired, frustrated. My beautiful Saturday was ruined.
Then Came My Marijuana Relapse
So what did I do to salvage my weekend? I called my old weed dealer. (When I quit, I should have deleted his number from my cell phone.) I didn’t even think about what I was doing. All I can tell you is that by Saturday evening I was smoking pot, and plenty of it. I spent the better part of Sunday stoned as well.
The sad part of this tale is that I really didn’t feel bad about myself, not at the time anyway. I was kind of thinking that I’ve proven to myself that I can quit when I want to and having a little smoke every now and then isn’t such a terrible thing. That’s what I was thinking anyway….
I smoked continuously through the holidays…and through most of January. Now, this time, I didn’t smoke as heavily as I used to but I was doing it fairly consistently, as in 5 or 6 times a week. Right after Christmas was when I noticed the listlessness setting in again, the despondency, the lack of ambition, and the general disorganization of thought. Ugh, what was I doing??!!
So the last week of January and the first week of February, I began to taper off again. I resolved not to buy anymore marijuana, and I didn’t, but when I wanted to get high I was harvesting tiny little buds out of nooks and crannies, brushing the microscopic green specs out of my grinder , and finally scraping the resin out of my pipes and putting it into my dusty old vaporizer.
Did you notice in the last paragraph how much smoking paraphernalia I still had laying around? That was my other mistake besides keeping my dealer’s number. I should have destroyed all the tools I used to use to smoke pot and gotten rid of my stash when I quit smoking weed. As I was going back through the guide, I realized that I didn’t follow the instructions as thoroughly as I should have to sustain a weed free (productive and happy) lifestyle.
Anyway, I went six months without smoking weed. Then I relapsed for three months or so. Now I’m on my 35th day of not smoking at all. I will keep you updated through this blog as to how I’m doing and I hope you will comment on my posts and let me know how you’re doing as well.
Update 11/03/2015: I’m now nine months into freedom from weed dependence and feeling better than ever.